Tasteless Collard Greens

Traditionally, collard greens are cooked with smoked ham hocks, onion, salt and maybe a dash of red pepper flakes and a splash of vinegar. Smoked ham hocks aren’t the healthiest protein in the world but add tremendous amounts of flavor, and everyone knows that onion is a vital part of the “holy trinity” of soul food cooking (the other two parts being bell pepper and celery).

My idea was to create a recipe for collards that had just as much flavor but with healthier ingredients and little to no fuss. So I substituted turkey bacon for the ham hocks, garlic for the red pepper flake and onion, and I never really liked vinegar anyway.Â

If there’s one thing I hate, it’s standing over a pot for two to three hours waiting for something to get tender enough to eat. So I decided to let my slow cooker do it for me. The result was, in my opinion, excellent. So enjoy my “tasteless collard greens”.

Yield: 8-10 servings

• 1 bunch fresh collards,chopped (or 1 bag of chopped)
• 4 strips turkey bacon
• 1 teaspoon garlic, minced
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2 tablespoons olive oil

1. Heat non-stick large skillet over medium heat.
2. Add 2 tablespoons olive oil and diced bacon. Brown bacon slowly until crisp.
3. Add in approximately half of chopped collards. Toss in skillet with tongs until fully coated with oil and bacon drippings and until collards start to wilt.
4. Add half the garlic and half the salt. Continue to cook collards until they’ve wilted down.
5. After volume has decreased by about 25%, add remaining collards. Toss until well coated with bacon drippings and oil.
6. Add remaining salt and garlic. Continue to wilt down.
7. Once collards have wilted, place in 5-6 quart crockpot. Cover with water and cook on low for 6 to 7 hours or until tender. Add more salt if needed.

Rating scale

1 star - Feed it to the dog

2 stars - Surprise your neighbor

3 stars - Definite keeper

4 stars - Looking forward to leftovers

5 stars - Clean plate and nap time! Are there enough ingredients left to make it again soon?

The Chef - 4 Stars

The Lucky Wife - 5 Stars

The Well-Fed Daughter (7 months old) - Mommy’s Baby Girl (5 Stars)

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